Project Instructions
Articles/Resources (if you find something good to share, please email a link to me!): Is Your Online Identity Spoiling Your Chances? Managing Your Online Identity Is Your Digital Identity Setting You Up For Trouble? Northeastern University - Social Media 3 Ways to Make Yourself Look LIke a Desirable Employee Online UBC - Your Online Identity How to Remove Yourself from Facebook Public Search How to Market Yourself Online Using Personal SEO Tactics onstrat.com - Web Searching Tools Open Source Intelligence Resources How YouTube Can Help Optimize Your Online Presence 6 Super Useful Steps To Improve Your Online Presence Presentation Schedule (beginning Tuesday, May 27): 1. Frank 2. Marissa 3. BK 4. Jina 5. Rhys 6. Sarah 7. Maddie 8. Tiger 9. Ray 10. Chris M 11. Dawson 12. Iman 13. Lucas 14. Parm 15. Sunah 16. Sean 17. Eric 18. Noor 19. Mackenzie 20. Salimah 21. Husain 22. Chris K 23. Matt 24. Carly Activity The members of your group will be explaining one general career focus area to the class. Your 3-4 minute presentation should include information such as:
Timeline You have 30 minutes to plan your presentation. You can put the information into a presentation of some kind (e.g. PowerPoint or Prezi), and/or type up notes for each person to read from. Everyone will present in the second half of this class. Quiz There will be a short quiz on Focus Areas next class. ![]()
Presentation Schedule
Friday, April 29: Suspension of Civil Rights & Liberties Tiger: Historical military/police states and dictatorships Jina: Case Study: Canada and the 1914 War Measures Act Sunah: Case Study: North Korea Friday, April 29: Surveillance Techniques (open) Methods of online surveillance Ray: Methods of "real life" surveillance Rhys: Indiviudals' rights to privacy in the modern world (including Canada's FOIPA) Monday, May 2: Mass Surveillance Salimah: Ethics of mass surveillance Eric: Methods of mass surveillance (open) Case Study: London, England (including CCTV) BK: Case Study: Surrey, BC (including intersection cameras) Monday, May 2: Encryption Parm: History of encryption Carly: Digital methods of encryptions Chris M: Uses of encryption in today's world Tuesday, May 3: Hacking Sarah: Ethics of computer hacking Noor: Hacking as a crime Sean: Hacktivism Mackenzie: Case Study: Anonymous Wednesday, May 4: Psychology & Human Behaviour (define, explain, provide examples) Chris K: Mob mentality/mob behaviour Matt: How people react to emergency situations Maddie: Paranoia and conspiracy theorists Iman: Intersectionality: Complexities of identity and how it affects people's actions and their consequences Husain: Fear: How it is used as a means of manipulation Thursday, May 4: Civil Rights & Liberties Lucas: Common causes of historical civil rights movements around the world Dawson: Common causes of modern civil rights movements around the world (open) Common passive/active and nonviolent/violent methods of civil rights movements (including civil disobedience) Frank Rights (or lack thereof) of prisoners in the modern world ![]()
Choose one of the topics below to write a detailed paragraph about. It should be 8-12 sentences; minimum 125 words; double-spaced; edited carefully; titled creatively; printed and handed in before the bell goes. You only get ONE piece of paper, so only print when you are sure you're ready. You will be assessed on:
Topic #1Describe an object that represents your own self-expression, much like how the poncho represents Sam's attempt to express aspects of himself (his personality, values, tastes, etc.). Topic #2How well does our school encourage you to be yourself? How well does the larger society honour and encourage you to be yourself? Why do you hold this perspective?
Politically Correct Three Little Pigs
Once there were 3 little pigs who lived together in mutual respect and in harmony with their environment. Using materials that were indigenous to the area they each built a beautiful house. One pig built a house of straw, one a house of sticks, and one a house of dung, clay and creeper vines shaped into bricks and baked in a small kiln. When they were finished, the pigs were satisfied with their work and settled back to live in peace and self-determination. But their idyll was soon shattered. One day, along came a big, bad wolf with expansionist ideas. He saw the pigs and grew very hungry in both a physical and ideological sense. When the pigs saw the wolf, they ran into the house of straw. The wolf ran up to the house and banged on the door, shouting, "Little pigs, little pigs, let me in!" The pigs shouted back, "Your gunboat tactics hold no fear for pigs defending their homes and culture." But the wolf wasn't to be denied what he thought was his manifest destiny. So he huffed and puffed and blew down the house of straw. The frightened pigs ran to the house of sticks, with the wolf in hot pursuit. Where the house had stood, other wolves bought up the land and started a banana plantation. At the house of sticks, the wolf again banged on the door and shouted, "Little, pigs, little pigs, let me in!" The pigs shouted back, "Go to hell, you carnivorous, imperialistic oppressor!" At this the wolf huffed and puffed and blew down the house of sticks. The pigs ran to the house of bricks, with the wolf close at their heels. Where the house of sticks had stood, other wolves built a time-share condo resort complex for vacationing wolves, with each unit a fibreglass reconstruction of the house of sticks, as well as native curio shops, snorkelling and dolphin shows. At the house of bricks, the wolf again banged on the door and shouted, "Little pigs, little pigs, let me in!" This time in response, the pigs sang songs of solidarity and wrote letters of protest to the United Nations. By now the wolf was getting angry at the pigs' refusal to see the situation from the carnivore's point of view. So he huffed and puffed, and huffed and puffed, then grabbed his chest and fell over dead from a massive heart attack brought on from eating too many fatty foods. The three little pigs rejoiced that justice had triumphed and did a little dance around the corpse of the wolf. Their next step was to liberate their homeland. They gathered together a band of other pigs who had been forced off their lands. This new brigade of porcinistas attacked the resort complex with machine-guns and rocket launchers and slaughtered the cruel wolf oppressors, sending a clear signal to the rest of the hemisphere not to meddle in their internal affairs. Then the pigs set up a model socialist democracy with free education, universal health care and affordable housing for everyone. {My note: well it is a fairy tale after all.} Please note: The wolf in this story was a metaphorical construct. No actual wolves were harmed in the writing of the story. Word document
PDF document When Knights Were Bald By David Gardiner The spot that Princess Trudy and her old man had chosen, after some negotiation with the dragon, was far from the Royal Palace (where there was known to be quite a bit of combustible material) and also well away from the more picturesque and visited parts of the kingdom, because the King understood only too well that the sacrificing of virgin princesses wasn’t good press for a tourist-based economy. The hill with the single mighty oak at the top overlooked a no-account peasant village - one of several the King had ransacked without success looking for a suitable country maiden to satisfy the dragon’s specialized homivorous tastes. The trouble was, these peasant girls were all offering special services to the tourists in the rustic hostelries, and virginity-wise none of them was going to fool a dragon for five seconds. Also in the aforementioned tourist based economy that wasn’t the kind of thing you wanted to subject to too much scrutiny. So in desperation the grief-stricken old ruler was left with no alternative but to offer his only daughter to save his kingdom from being laid waste by this last remaining fire-breathing dragon. It had been a terrible decision, but now that it was made he consoled himself by recalling the way Princess Trudy had changed since becoming a teenager. As a salve to his conscience, and at Trudy’s suggestion, he had put up a few notices to the effect that if any brave knight should be able to slay the dragon and rescue the princess, he was welcome to her, together with half the kingdom, by way of a sugaring on the pill. Can’t say fairer than that, he mused, as he watched the soldiers strap the oddly compliant junior royal to the trunk of the tree before trotting their horses back to the yellow police cordon tapes. Behind the cordon, at the feet of the mounted king, a few lowly serfs looked on in hushed disbelief. “I thought it had to be a virgin,” one of them whispered through his teeth. “Something to say, excrement?” “No, Sire! God bless you, Sire!” It wasn’t good for ones subjects, he reflected, all this contact with the outside world. Progress. That’s what they called it. Open Monarchy. Maybe he was becoming old-fashioned. Maybe it was time for a change in his style of kingship. Somehow the foul-smelling masses didn’t seem to love him the way they used to. He began mentally composing a speech that he would make from the Palace balcony as soon as he got back from this event. Difficult not to think of it as a royal barbecue. A great whoop of amazement went up from the odoriferous onlookers. A half-discernable object like a gigantic bat had flitted for a moment across the searing face of the noonday sun. As they watched it performed another sun-passage, followed by a swoop at high speed over the top of the oak tree. The peasants cheered in ill-considered delight. “I can still strap one of you to that Goddamned tree!” the King rebuked them furiously. Despite their confidence that they did not meet the dragon’s requirements several of the female onlookers paled noticeably and urged their men folk to display a little more tact. On its second dramatic swoop, after performing a slow roll at rooftop height, the dragon nonchalantly shot a single blinding plume of white hot breath towards the tree, setting its higher branches alight. Unwisely, the peasants again applauded. The King was about to launch into another blood-curdling tirade when all were distracted by the sound of charging hoof beats. From the other side of the hill, a lone mounted figure appeared, long sword unsheathed, battle lance at the ready. A barely audible groan of disappointment went up from the crowd. The newcomer brought his charger to a halt at the feet of the princess and dismounted gracefully if a little anxiously. Unfortunately he was a bit too far away for anybody to make out the conversation that ensued. ~~~~~~~ “What the f*** do you think you’re doing with that sword?” “Releasing you from your bonds, your royal highness.” “Sod off, you interfering retard. You’re not Sir Kevin Dandiprat. Who asked you to stick your sword in?” “Your noble father the King, Royal Highness, when he and his soldiers did that bit of fly-posting the other night.” “That didn’t mean you, you brainless turd... And get your hand off my arm. No handling the goods before purchase.” “Now you look here, you spoiled foul-mouthed little brat, I intend to rescue you and I intend to marry you, as advertised, and I intend to get half your father’s kingdom, and if you don’t like it you can kiss my ass, you ungrateful...” His train of thought was interrupted by the re-arrival of the dragon, swooping lower than ever, causing his horse to bolt, and leaving a long swath of black singed grass just in front of where the princess was lashed to the rapidly combusting tree. After an initial agile sidestep towards the shelter of the tree the knight pulled himself up to his full height and intoned in a slightly shaky voice: “Have no fear, Princess. I am none other than the world renowned Sir Eustace Curdylion, slayer of dragons and protector of maidens, by appointment to all the royal courts of Europe. Available as an after dinner speaker by arrangement with my agent.” The dragon, which was becoming bolder by the minute, initiated another low flypast. Sir Eustace executed another rapid and skilful sidestep behind the shelter of the tree and the princess, but peeking out at just the right moment he managed to fling his sword into the air just ahead of the approaching mythical reptile and scored a direct hit to the base of its right wing. The animal squealed and immediately went into an emergency landing procedure, banking steeply to the right while applying full flap to lower its stalling speed and attempting to utilize outstretched legs and exaggerated angle of attack as improvised air brakes. The manoeuvre met with limited success due to lack of altitude and the stricken creature contacted the ground at a speed well beyond its design landing parameters and somersaulted several times before coming to rest in a semi conscious condition at the bottom of the hill on the side that was out of view of the King and the shocked onlookers. “You great brainless oaf!” the Princess exploded, “what did you do that for?” As she spoke a large burning branch fell from the inferno above her and landed a few paces from her feet. “Get me out of these straps, you air-head!” “Perhaps her royal highness would like to say please?” As soon as she was free the Princess started to run down the hill towards the stricken dragon, the confused knight at her heels. “Ivor! Ivor!” she cried, “Are you all right?” The dragon stirred and lifted its mighty head into the air atop an undulating snake-like scaly neck. It looked down at them contemptuously. “All right? All right indeed?” it scoffed in a lilting Welsh accent, “Is that the way you treat the world’s last surviving fully operational Equity registered dragon? Is that what you call a little bit of play-acting for the crowd? Look you, we had a deal, ma van wee, and that wasn’t part of it. I don’t have to do this kind of thing, you know. I can earn more for one shoot in the ‘States than for six of these virgin-eating gigs. I have contacts. Next time you want a unicorn or a fairy princess or an ogre, you can forget it because you have just lost your credibility within the mythical realm. I’m a professional and I work to the script you give me. Unagreed stunts like that are outside of the pale altogether. I’m going to need a lot extra, look you, for distress and unpleasantness, and if I’ve lost any scales, we’re into a whole different ball park, and that’s no mistake.” “Ivor, I can’t apologise enough. This half-witted ugly old dinosaur of a dragon-slayer just stuck his oar in without a by your leave...” “Ugly old dinosaur! Who was it cut those straps when you were about to be roasted alive...?” “What do you mean ‘ugly old dinosaur’?” the dragon interrupted indignantly, “some of my very best friends were dinosaurs, before they ran into that rough patch.” “Sorry Ivor. We’ve all had a hard day. It’s just that he’s messed everything up. It was supposed to be Sir Kevin Dandiprat. I don’t know why he isn’t here, I don’t understand it.” “I think I’m beginning to understand it,” Sir Eustace put in with a glint in his eye, “is he a sort of girlish blond-haired poncy chinless aristocratic type with designer armour and a carbon fibre lance that he doesn’t know what to do with?” “How dare you, he’s very sweet. All the girls think he’s gorgeous. He and I have had a thing going for months.” “Thought so. Wouldn’t give way to me at the bridge. Knocked him into the river ass over tit. So that’s what it was all about. You set up this little pantomime so your dad would let you marry him and give you half the kingdom. Neat. Nasty. Glad you’re not a daughter of mine.” The dragon, whose head was some forty feet in the air, announced that he could see the aforementioned Dandiprat legging it towards them across the fields in dripping wet armour and without horse or weapons. He arrived panting and opened his arms to embrace the still irate princess. “Don’t you get river-slime on me, you useless prick. Where were you when I needed you?” “Kevin,” the older knight enquired thoughtfully, “do you really want to marry this... person?” “She’s the King’s daughter.” “Think carefully. You’re a bit of a twat but I wouldn’t really wish that fate on you.” The Princess’ eyes widened with fury. “Tell you what then,” Sir Eustace continued. ”Let’s make a deal. You get Trudy, I get the real estate. I think her old man will buy it. What do you say?” Sir Kevin stared at Princess Trudy in shocked silence. “But... where would we live,” he said at last in a quavering high-pitched voice, “what would we live on? Who would pay the bills? What would we have for an income.... We might have to...” he winced involuntarily as he pronounced the word “work!” “Oh I see it all now. A fine romantic soul you are. So that’s all I mean to you! Well, I’m going to give you a bit of my mind, Kevin, you good-for-nothing under-endowed...” As she warmed to her theme the dragon pulled himself ponderously on to his feet, removed Sir Eustace’s sword from below his wing like pulling out a mildly irritating thorn, and started to stroll slowly back down the hill. He had really had quite enough of that particular royal princess for one day. Sir Eustace walked by his side and struck up a conversation. “You know, we would make quite a double act, wouldn’t we? I mean, let me level with you, you’re the first dragon I’ve ever even seen let alone killed. That was just a lucky shot. If you and I were to team up, I wouldn’t have to go around telling tall tales any more. We could work out a routine. Clean up. What do you say?” “Sorry,” the dragon replied absently, “I was miles away. Do you think, in the circumstances, it would be ethical for me to go back and eat Princess Trudy?” “Are you serious Ivor? Can you imagine what she would taste like?” Word document
PDF document THE DAY ELVIS STOPPED BY Sisters, Elsabe and Katrina still lived in the same house they had grown up in, in the Namaqualand; a hot, almost desert-like region of South Africa that stretches from the Northern Cape to the shores of the Atlantic Ocean in the west. Both had never married. Not that they were ugly mind you; some people even said that if Elsabe took the effort she would be quite attractive. Katrina on the other hand, resembled the dry, harsh landscape, but nothing that a little makeup couldn’t fix said others. For those who dared ask as to why they remained single, Katrina would quickly point out, ‘Because we prefer not having to answer to anyone, hey Elsabe?’ And even though she disagreed with her sister, Elsabe would just go along with Katrina as always. She had learned a long time ago it was easier that way. The backdoor and the windows were open wide, but inside the small kitchen it was scorching. Elsabe sighed as she glanced up at the ceiling fan. ‘We should ask old Danny to come over and fix this thing … I can’t take much more of this heat,’ she grumbled. Katrina nodded, ‘Just a few more weeks and then the spring rains will come, that’ll cool things down nicely.’ Elsabe nodded. She loved the spring rains. It was as though Mother Nature waved a wand over the earth and then the ground would be almost magically transformed into a wondrous explosion of colours. And, for a time, the earth would be covered in a blanket of flowers and the air filled with its fragrant scent. Wiping her face with a damp facecloth, Elsabe wondered how come the heat never seemed to bother her sister who always managed to remain unflustered ‘Hurry up with those sandwiches, they must go into the fridge before they spoil,’ ordered Katrina as Elsabe lethargically spooned the egg and mayonnaise mixture between the slices of fresh home-baked bread. For as long as she could remember, she and Katrina were responsible for preparing the eats for the Church’s monthly picnic for the underprivileged coloured children of the community. However, recently, Elsabe had been feeling restless. Hardly anyone stopped by for a visit, not since their old pa had passed away some eighteen months earlier. She longed for male company, but it was more than that, she wished for someone to come along and sweep her off her feet, like in those romance novels she read. Of course she dared not mention this to Katrina as she’d be horrified to say the least. Just then there was a loud knock on the front door and Elsabe, glad to escape her melancholy thoughts, rushed to see who it could be. She gasped as she opened the door, for standing before her was the most beautiful man she had ever seen, almost like Elvis in a way. ‘Morning lady,’ he flashed a wide, friendly grin. She shyly smoothed down her dark, unruly curls as she gazed up at him. He looked as though he had walked for miles; his shoes, trousers and jacket were covered in a layer of red dust from the gravel road that passed their house. Drops of sweat clung to his forehead and she couldn’t help but notice that the first three buttons of his white shirt were undone and exposed his smooth, pale chest. Her cheeks burned as she tried her best not to stare. ‘Um, my car’s gone and broken down a few miles down that way,’ he pointed vaguely towards the bleached grass plains that surrounded their house. ‘And this was the first place I happened to stumble across … I wondered if you have a phone so I can call the garage?’ Elsabe reluctantly raised her gaze from his chest and stared into the bluest eyes she’d ever seen; just like the colour of the wide African sky. ‘Ja, certainly, come inside,’ she replied, somewhat breathlessly. That he had not bothered to shake the dust off his shoes or any of his belongings, including a guitar, didn’t bother her in the slightest. The fact that she’d just let a complete stranger into their house also slipped her mind. She was far too excited to have someone other than Katrina to talk with. Elsabe waited until he’d lifted the phone to his ear, then not wanting to appear intrusive, left the lounge and hurried into the kitchen. Besides, the lanky young man looked as though he could do with a good hearty meal. ‘So, who was it?’ asked Katrina as she emptied the chocolate cake batter into the baking tins. ‘A young man, his car broke down and he wanted to use the phone,’ explained Elsabe as she opened the fridge. ‘Well, I hope you told him to keep walking ‘til he reached town,’ replied Katrina. Elsabe shook her head and waited for her sister’s inevitable outburst. ‘What? You let a stranger in, knowing he could murder us or even worse …’ she gave an exaggerated shiver. Elsabe clicked her tongue impatiently, ‘Tch, don’t be silly Katrina! I could tell he’s a decent bloke.’ Katrina shook her head in astonishment, 'Elsabe Du Randt, what on earth is going on in that head of yours?’ She then held up her hand and answered her own question, ‘actually I don’t want to know, the expression on your face says it all! Have you no shame?’ And as she watched Elsabe taking food out of the fridge, she exclaimed, ‘Don’t tell me you’re feeding him too!’ ‘Yes, shame, the poor thing looks starving, like he hasn’t eaten in flipping days!’ she replied as she dished up chicken, cooked ham, roasted sweet potatoes and baked pumpkin onto a plate. She turned to Katrina, ‘I hope there’s still some bread pudding and custard left, hey?’ ‘Hmmm, a feast fit for a king!’ Elsabe glanced up and giggled like a school girl as the young man swaggered into the kitchen and boldly pulled out a chair and flopped down, making himself quite at home. ‘I’m Katrina, Katrina Du Randt,’ said the older of the two sisters holding out her hand, but the young man did not bother glancing up as he wolfed down the food. Between mouthfuls, he mumbled, ‘Hello Kat … my name is Elvis, Elvis Terblanche.’ Elsabe’s jaw dropped as she exclaimed, ‘And you even look like him … when he was young though, not when he got fat like that, you know, before he died!’ He laughed, ‘Ja, that’s right, everyone says so! My old ma was besotted with him … when he died she even put a verse in our local newspaper!’ Elsabe chuckled. ‘She was pregnant with me at the time, so when I was born she named me Elvis Presley Terblanche. Try growing up with that name hanging around your neck!’ ‘And I suppose you can you sing too … I see you’ve got a guitar with you,’ said Elsabe. Elvis shrugged, ‘A little bit.’ She pulled out a chair on the opposite side of the table and proceeded to watch Elvis eat. She had read somewhere that one could tell a lot about a man from his appetite. And judging by the way Elvis devoured the chicken, Elsabe would not have minded being the drumstick. Licking his lips, Elvis exclaimed, ‘Well, whoever cooked this meal, I must say well done, it is absolutely fantastic!’ ‘It was me, Elvis,’ gushed Elsabe and as she said the words, realised how ridiculous she sounded. But, it didn’t matter; there was a beautiful young man in their kitchen. That his name was Elvis was not important, he could have been called Jannie or Piet, it wouldn’t have made any difference to her. He leaned back in the chair and slipped a cigarette between his lips and then reached into his pocket and pulled out a box of matches and a lighter. Oddly though, he did not use the matches to light his cigarette, instead this he did with the lighter. Elsabe’s gaze rested on his hands. The hands of an artist she thought. She shut her eyes and for a moment imagined those very hands on her body. Her face grew warm at her thoughts and she quickly opened her eyes and watched as Elvis puffed on the cigarette. ‘I don’t want to put you two ladies out, but the garage can only have my car ready in a few days, so do you mind if I stay here until it’s done?’ he asked as he winked at Elsabe. Her face flushed with pleasure as both she and Katrina for once agreed on something and together they replied, ‘Certainly Elvis, certainly!’ He chuckled as he lifted the matchbox and shook it a few times then slipped it back into his shirt pocket. Later that afternoon while Katrina took Elvis to see their vegetable garden, Elsabe slipped into her bedroom. She opened her dressing table drawer and pulled out the tube of lipstick and the small bottle of perfume she had bought from the chemist shop on her and Katrina’s last trip into town. Slipping into a pale, pink cotton dress, Elsabe had never felt so alive. For the first time in years she felt a sense of anticipation in the pit of her stomach. Every nerve in her body soared with excitement. She slid the bright red lipstick over her thin, dry lips. Elsabe glanced into the cracked mirror and then added some of the colour to her pale cheeks. Reaching for the bottle of perfume, she turned the cap and breathed in the scent; it smelled of flowers, like the ones that bloomed after the spring rains. Undoing the buttons in the front of her dress, she splashed the perfume between her breasts and behind her ears and even sprinkled a few drops in her hair. At that moment her bedroom door creaked open. Katrina stared at Elsabe, an expression of pity in her dark eyes as she asked quietly, ‘What are you up to? Is this for him, for Elvis?’ Elsabe’s cheeks burned with embarrassment. She glanced down and shrugged. ‘Don’t be stupid, man! He’s far too young for you … besides he’s not going to stay!’ Elsabe knew Katrina was right. ‘Go wash your face and take that silly dress off, suppers almost ready,’ said Katrina kindly. After they’d eaten, Elvis regaled them with tales of his travels. Apparently he’d worked in every profession imaginable, even as a diver on the alluvial diamond diggings along the West Coast. ‘Hmm, that Atlantic Ocean is freezing,’ he laughed, shaking the matchbox in his hand. He said he’d even done a stint as a singer for a few months in a bar in Bloemfontein, and then spent time as a fisherman on a trawler in Cape Town and after that he’d worked as a chef. ‘Actually it was more like a cook in a café by some railway station, nothing fancy, just pies, chips and sandwiches, you know, that kind of thing.’ Elsabe smiled. She didn’t care what he did. She wished he’d stay, or better still - ask her to run off with him. But, she knew that wouldn’t happen. He had far too much life inside him and lots of living that he still had to do. He wouldn’t want to stay in such a desolate part of the country where the only entertainment was when the small town held their annual Farmers Orchestra contest. Over the next several days, she spent as much time as she could with Elvis. He had even fixed the ceiling fan in the kitchen and the one in the lounge. Most nights as they sat in the darkened lounge, the only light from the full yellow moon and the only sound, the whirring of the fan above, Elsabe would convince Elvis to sing for them. ‘Elvis, come on, play for us,’ she urged. At first he had appeared reluctant, but then he had picked up his guitar and begun to strum. He sang in Afrikaans, of sad lives and lost loves. And if there is one thing South Africans love, it is a really miserable, depressing story. His voice was deep and rich and cracked every so often which Elsabe thought just added to the sadness of the song. ‘Gosh, Elvis, you sing really well, hey! Even better than the real Elvis, actually, to tell you the truth, half the time I couldn’t understand him, he mumbled so!’ They laughed, even Katrina. That night after they’d all gone to bed, Elvis had crept into her bedroom. He sat on her bed and they spoke for a long time in hushed tones. And then he had leaned over and kissed her on her mouth; nothing passionate, just a soft touch of his lips on hers, but that’s all she needed. It felt like the first time she had tasted an ice cold coca cola. After he’d left, Elsabe breathed in deeply; his scent filled the room and for the first time in years, it was as though she smelled life. A few days later, Elvis announced he was leaving. ‘The garage couldn’t fix the car, so I’m going to take a train up to Jo’burg …’ he said, his gaze darting around the kitchen. Elsabe felt as though someone had kicked her in the stomach. Tears pricked her eyes. Katrina shrugged, ‘Oh well, you were bound to leave sooner or later, I suppose,’ she murmured, disappointment flooding her eyes. Filled with sorrow, Elsabe watched as he packed the cheese and jam sandwiches and the flask of tea she’d made for him into his old suitcase. It dawned on her that she would never see him again. She had to have something to remember him by and when he left the room, she took her chance. She grabbed the box of matches out from where she’d seen him place it, under his underpants at the bottom of the case. She slipped it inside her bra. She’d keep it there everyday, close to her heart. The house was quiet after he’d left. Elsabe was glum, Katrina more miserable than ever. ‘Let’s go into town and spoil ourselves a little,’ said Katrina. Elsabe shrugged, ‘Okay, if you want to … maybe we can buy our dresses for the church picnic and then go to bioscope!’ A few moments later, Katrina burst into her room. ‘Well, we can forget our shopping trip, we have no money, and even our bank cards are gone…. It’s that flipping Elvis, he’s gone and stolen all of it!’ she shrieked. Elsabe would not hear of it, ‘Never, it must’ve been someone else …’ she said. But no sooner had she said it than she realised that Katrina was quite right; it could only have been Elvis; he had stolen every last cent. ‘We better phone the police,’ she murmured. ‘What? Phone the police, how do you think it’ll look if we tell them that Elvis Presley Terblanche robbed us … we’re going to look like two idiots; being taken in by someone called Elvis, we will be the laughing stock of the entire district!’ Elsabe sighed; her sister was right. She reached into her bra and pulled out the matchbox and slowly opened it. Her jaw dropped, her eyes grew large, ‘Katrina look, Katrina look …!’ she thrust the box under her sister’s nose. After the reality of their situation sunk in they both burst out laughing. They rolled on the bed, clutching their stomachs. ‘He can have our bank cards and the two thousand rand we have between the two of us …’ howled Katrina. Elsabe wiped the tears from her eyes, ‘Ja,, we’re rich, rich!’ She emptied the contents of the matchbox onto the purple quilt on her bed and there they lay; twinkling and sparkling up at her, a handful of diamonds that Elvis must have stolen when he’d worked as a diver on the alluvial diggings. ‘Well, well, Elvis robbing us was a blessing in disguise … ‘said Elsabe. She harboured no anger towards Elvis; instead she felt gratitude for that bitter-sweet kiss they had shared. Elvis had awakened something inside her, something she had only ever dreamed of - the desire to love. And now with those diamonds that was just what she was going to do. She could leave this dry, forgotten town and find herself a man to love, someone she could call her own. And she had Elvis to thank for that. Elsabe smiled; for a moment she was almost certain she heard the real Elvis murmur, ‘Thank you, thank you very much! Word document
PDF document Full text: A MIDSUMMER NIGHT’S DREAM A Comedy by William Shakespeare Simplified version by Cinna http://www.aizawa.2y.net/sp/English.htm Characters: Main group: THESEUS, ruler of Athens HIPPOLYTA, bride of Theseus (from the Amazon) EGEUS, friend of Theseus HERMIA, daughter of Egeus DEMETRIUS, boy chosen by Egeus to marry Hermia. LYSANDER, boy that Hermia actually loves HELENA, friend of Hermia who loves Demetrius Clowns: QUINCE, who later plays the Moon SNOUT, who later plays a wall BOTTOM, who becomes a donkey and later plays Pyramus FLUTE, who later plays Thisbe SNUG, who later plays a lion Fairies: OBERON, king of the fairies TITANIA, queen of the fairies PUCK, servant of Oberon SCENE 1 (city) (Enter THESEUS and HIPPOLYTA from opposite sides.) Theseus: Hippolyta ! Hippolyta: Theseus ! Theseus: In four more days, we shall marry. Hippolyta: Four days ! I cannot wait so long! Theseus: Look at the moon. When it is full, we shall marry. Hippolyta: It is almost full now. Theseus: In four days it will be full. (Enter EGEUS, HERMIA, LYSANDER, DEMETRIUS.) Egeus: Congratulations, my lord. Theseus: Thank you, Egeus. Egeus: And may you long be happy with Queen Hippolyta. Hippolyta: Thank you, good Egeus. Egeus: May I ask you a favour, my lord ? Theseus: A favour ? Certainly. What is it? Egeus: This is my daughter Hermia. Theseus: I know her well. Egeus: And this is Demetrius. Theseus: Yes, I know. Egeus: I have chosen him to marry my daughter. Theseus: Another marriage ! Congratulations to you both. Demetrius: Thank you, my lord. Theseus: Egeus, you have made an excellent choice. Egeus: I think so, sir, but my daughter does not. Theseus: No? Egeus: No. She wishes to marry Lysander here. Theseus: What do you say, Hermia ? Demetrius is a fine man. Hermia: And so is Lysander. Theseus: Certainly, they are both fine. However, you can have only one husband, and your father favours Demetrius. Hermia: I wish my father looked with my eyes. Theseus: You must look with his judgement. Hermia: How can my father be so cruel! Tell me, my lord, what will happen if I refuse to marry Demetrius ? Theseus: Refuse! If you refuse to obey your father, that is a serious matter. Hermia: What is the punishment? Theseus: Death. Hermia: Death ? Theseus: You should obey your father. If you do not, then you must die at once, or you may choose to live alone and never meet another man.Hermia: That will be a slow death. Theseus: I will marry Hippolyta at the full moon, four days from now. Think carefully, and by that time make up your mind. Hermia: I love Lysander. Demetrius: Hermia ! Change your mind! And you, Lysander, listen to her father. Lysander: Demetrius, you have her father's love. Let me have Hermia. You marry the father. Egeus: Very funny. It is true he has my love, and therefore I give him my daughter. Theseus: Let us go, Hippolyta. Egeus and Demetrius come with us. Hermia, I advise you to listen to your father's wishes. If you do not, then the laws of Athens will be severe. (Exit all but LYSANDER and HERMIA.) Lysander: Hermia ! Why are you so pale? Hermia: Because I may lose my dearest Lysander. Lysander: The course of true love never did run smooth. Hermia: What can we do? Lysander: Run away. Hermia: Run away? What do you mean? Lysander: We must run away from Athens, and in some distant place where the law of Athens has no power, we can marry. Hermia: Yes ! Lysander: Meet me at the city gate tomorrow night. Hermia: I will. Lysander: Look ! Here comes Helena. (Enter HELENA. ) Hermia: Helena ! Helena: Hermia ! And Lysander. What's the matter, Hermia? You seem unhappy. Hermia: I am. This is my love, Lysander, but my father wants me to marry Demetrius. Helen: Demetrius! But I want to marry Demetrius. Hermia: Then marry him, please. I want this boy. Lysander: We are going to leave Athens secretly tomorrow, and marry in a distant place. Helena: Good luck ! Hermia: And good luck with Demetrius. (Exit LYSANDER and HERMIA.) Helena: Demetrius loved me once. Then he met Hermia. She is more beautiful than I am, and so he fell in love with her. If I tell him they plan to marry in secret . . . perhaps he will show me a little gratitude. Perhaps even love me. (Exit.) SCENE 2 (forest) (Enter the CLOWNS) Quince: Is everybody here ? Bottom: Read their names. Quince: I will. Bottom: And tell us why you want to see us. Quince: The duke Theseus is to marry the queen Hippolyta. Bottom: That is no concern of ours. Quince: You are wrong, good Bottom; it is. Snug: How ? Quince: We are asked to perform a play, and will be well paid if it is good. Flute: What play is this ? Quince: It is called "The Most Sad Love and Happy Death of Pyramus and Thisbe." Snout: An excellent play. Quince: Bottom will play Pyramus. Bottom: Pyramus? What is he? A lover? Or a killer ? Quince: He is both. First he loves Thisbe, and then he kills himself. Bottom: Why ? Quince: Because the writer of' the play says so. Bottom: But if he loves Thisbe, why should he kill himself? Quince: Quiet! You are to act the play, not to write it. Bottom: Act, yes. I shall make the audience laugh, and weep, and I shall. . . . Quince: Quiet, Bottom. Let me continue. Flute. Flute: Yes. Quince: You shall be Thisbe. Flute: Good. Who is he ? Quince: It is not he. It is she. Flute: I am to play a woman ? Quince: Yes. Flute: No, please. I am too old. Look, there is hair on my face. Quince: Then you must shave. Bottom: I will play the lady Thisbe. I will speak in a beautiful high voice. (He speaks in a high voice.) "Oh Pyramus. I love you. Oh ! Oh ! Oh !" Quince: No, Bottom, no. Quiet, please. You are Pyramus, and Flute is Thisbe. Bottom: Okay, but I think.... All: Quiet, Bottom. (BOTTOM puts finger on lips.) Quince: Snout ? Snout: Yes. Quince: You shall be a wall. Bottom: A wall ! All: Quiet, Bottom. Quince: Snout, you are a wall. The lovers are on different sides of the wall, and they must whisper through a little hole in you. Snout: There is no little hole through me. Quince: Then hold your fingers so. (Holds fingers in a circle.) Now, Snug. Snug: Yes. Quince: You are a lion. Bottom: Oh, let me be the lion! I am a wonderfully good roarer. I shall roar so well that the duke will say, "Well roared lion let him roar again. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr ! Quince: That's much too good. All the ladies will scream and run. No, let Snug be lion. Snug: Well, give me the words to learn as soon as you can because I am very slow. Quince: You have no words. You only roar. Bottom: Go on, roar. Snug (very quietly) : Grrrr. Bottom: No, no, no, you are not a mouse. You must roar like this . . . . All: Bottom ! Quince: I shall be moonshine. I shine and give light. We will meet tomorrow night and practise in secret. Snug: Then let's go out of Athens and practise in the forest. Quince: Good idea. Everybody, bring some suitable clothes for your part. We'll meet tomorrow night at the city gates. All: Yes. Good night. (Exit all.) SCENE 3 (forest) (Enter OBERON and TITANIA from opposite sides.) Titania: Oberon ! Oberon: Titania! Ill met by moon light, proud Titania. Titania: I have come to the wedding of Theseus. I have not come to see you. Oberon: You are my wife ! Titania: No longer. Oberon: Oh yes. And where is my son ! Titania: You shall not have the boy. Oberon: I must. Titania: Never ! You are a bad father. Oberon: Please ! Let me see him. Titania: No ! (Exit TITANlA.) Oberon: Come hither, my gentle Puck. (Enter PUCK.) Puck: I am here, sir. Oberon: My jealous wife is hiding my boy. Puck: It is a bad business. Oberon: I must have revenge. Puck: Will you steal the boy, then? Oberon: I don't know. First, I must humiliate proud Titania. Go and bring me that flower called love-in-idleness.Puck: Love-in-idleness . Oberon: Yes. That is a magic flower. When she is sleeping, I will squeeze the juice of the flower on her eyelids. Then, when she wakes, she will love the first thing she sees, however foolish. Hurry ! Puck: I will go round the world in forty minutes. (Exit PUCK. Enter DEMETRIUS and HELENA.) Demetrius: Go away. Don't follow me. I do not love you. Helena: You loved me once. Demetrius: But not now. Hermia is my love. Helena: But she does not love you. Demetrius: You said Hermia and Lysander were running away from Athens into this forest. Where are they? I do not see them. Helena: They are here somewhere, I am sure. Let us look. Demetrius: Not together, I will look alone. Good bye. (Exit DEMETRlUS. ) Helena: And I will follow you. (Exit HELENA.) Oberon: Very strange! (Enter Puck.) Puck: Here I am. Oberon: That was quite quick. Puck: And here is the flower you want. Oberon: Give it to me. (PUCK gives flower to OBERON.) Oberon: I know a bank where the wild thyme blows, where oxlips and the nodding violet grows. Quite overcanopied with luscious woodbine and with sweet muskroses and with eglantine. There sleeps Titania sometimes of the night. I will find her, and squeeze this flower on her eyes. Puck: Shall I come with you ? Oberon: No. Just now a man from Athens went that way. (He points after DEMETRIUS.) Find him. He is scorning the love of a lady. Wait till he sleeps and then squeeze the juice on his eyes, so he may awake and see the lady. This will bring love to them. Puck: I will try to find him. (Exit separately.) SCENE 4 (forest) (Enter TITANIA. She lies down and sleeps; enter OBERON stealthily; he squeezes the flower over her eyes, and exits; enter LYSANDER and HERMIA.) Lysander: Let us sleep under this tree, Hermia. Hermia: Yes, I am very tired. Lysander: Here . Hermia: No, here. That is too close. (They lie down, separately.) Lysander: Good night. Hermia: Happy dreams. ( They sleep; enter PUCK.) Puck: Aha! Is this the man Oberon told me to find?I think it must be. And that must be the girl he does not love. They are not very close ! Puck (squeezes flower on LYSANDER'S eyes) : When he wakes he will love her, I hope. (Exit PUCK.) (Enter DEMETRIUS and HELENA. She is chasing him . ) Helena: Stop ! Stop ! Demetrius. Demetrius: Leave me alone ! Helena: It is dark ! I cannot see. Please stop here ! Demetrius: Stop here if you wish. I will go. (DEMETRlUS exits.) Helena (sits) : Demetrius hates me. Now I am alone in this forest. It is dark and dangerous. Perhaps some animal will attack me. Who is this ? Lysander! Is he dead ? Lysander (wakes) : Helena, my love ! Helena: Lysander. I thought that you loved Hermia. Lysander: Hermia ? That was just a passing mood. It is you that I truly love. Helena: Do not tease me. I know you love Hermia. Lysander: I am not teasing. I love you, dear Helena. Helena: You are joking. Lysander: No, no, believe me, I am serious. Helena (angry) : Demetrius insults me and you make fun of me. I want to cry.(Exit HELENA.) Lysander: Helena ! Come back. I want you. I want you. (Exit LYSANDER.) Hermia (wakes) : Lysander ! Lysander. Where are you? He has gone. Help! (Exit HERMIA.) SCENE 5 (forest) (Enter the clowns.) Bottom: Is every one here ? Quince: I think so. This grass will make a perfect stage. Let us rehearse our play here. Bottom: Before we start we must make some changes. Quince: Why ? Bottom: Well, firstly, it says that Pyramus kills himself. Now that will never do. The ladies will not like it. Snout: True . Bottom: The ladies will scream and faint. Flute: We must have no killing. Bottom: And then there is a lion. Now a lion among ladies is a terrible thing. They will not like it. The lion is a most dangerous bird. Quince: Bird ! A lion is not a bird. Bottom: The lion roars, doesn't it ? Quince: Of course. Bottom: Then the ladies will be frightened by the roaring. Snug: If queen Hippolyta is frightened, the duke Theseus will hang us. Quince: No, no, no, don't be so silly. Bottom: I think I have a solution. Snug must dress as a lion, but he must let the ladies see his face. Then they will know he is not a true lion. Quince: Yes, all right, Snug can do that. Now the lovers meet by moonlight. Today we have a moon, but on the day we perform the play is there a moon? Bottom: Of course. There is always a moon. Quince: I mean, does the moon shine on Athens that day ? Bottom: Ah, I don't know. Quince: Then one man must carry a lantern and be moonlight. Bottom: I will do that. Quince: No, no, you are Pyramus. Now the lovers meet on opposite sides of a wall. Snout, you are the wall. Prepare a chink for the lovers to talk through. Snout: A chink ? Quince: A little hole, a gap, a crack. Bottom: A chink. Quince: Exactly. Every man put on his clothes and let us begin to practise our play. ( The men start to change their clothes. PUCK enters carrying the head of an donkey. He puts this over the head of BOTTOM.) Bottom: Is this for me, Quince? How very strange. (He sits down near TITANIA. She wakes.) Titania: Oh what a handsome man ! Bottom: Me ! Titania: Yes, you. Bottom: Well ! Nobody ever called me handsome. Titania: Good, then I will be the first. Bottom: Who are you ? Titania: Who do you think ? You are so handsome and wise you can easily decide about a simple girl like me. Bottom (confused) : Oh. Titania: Shall we go for a little walk ? Bottom(pleased) : That's a very good idea. (TITANlA and BOTTOM exit together; the others continue dressing, and see nothing. Enter OBERON.) Oberon: I wonder if Titania has woken up yet. Puck: Oh yes. These fellows are rehearsing a play, and I put the head of a donkey on one man. She saw him first, and is now madly in love with him. Oberon (pleased) : Titania in love with an donkey! Puck: Yes, and they are now walking together in the moonlight. Oberon: Marvelous. Puck: It was very funny. Oberon: And I am revenged.Puck: You are. Oberon: Now I must go and find my boy. By the way, did you find that Athenian man I told you about? Puck: I did, and I squeezed the flower on his eyes as you said. Oberon: Good. And here he comes. (Enter DEMETRIUS and HERMIA.) Puck: This is the woman. Oberon: Yes. Puck: But not the man. Oberon (surprised) : What ! Puck: I squeezed the flower on a different man ! Oberon: Puck! What have you done! Demetrius (to HERMIA) : Why are you so unkind to me ? Hermia (to DEMETRIUS) : Where is Lysander ? I think you have killed him. Demetrius: No, never. Hermia: Then where is he? Demetrius: How should I know ? Hermia: You devil. Demetrius: I don't like him, but I have no reason to kill him. For all I know, he is still alive. Hermia: I hate you. Demetrius: Don't say so! I love you. Hermia (angry) : Good bye. (Exit HERMIA.) Demetrius: I love her, but she is in a rage. Tomorrow she will calm down a bit, so I will wait until then. This seems a nice place to sleep, so I will take a rest. (DEMETRlUS lies down and sleeps.) Oberon: Puck! Look what you have done! Go and bring his true love Helena here as fast as possible. (Exit PUCK. OBERON squeezes flower on DEMETRlUS's eyes; enter Puck.) Puck: Helena is coming. Oberon: Good, then let's hide. Puck: She is with the man I mistook for this one. He is trying to make love to her. What fools men are! Oberon: They may wake Demetrius with the sound of their voices. (Enter LYSANDER and HELENA. ) Helena: You scorn me ! You insult me! Lysander: Why do you say so ? Helena: Because you say you love me, but yesterday I heard you say the same thing to Hermia. Lysander: Then I was a fool yesterday. Helena: Oh ? And tomorrow ? Lysander: Demetrius loves Hermia. Helena: But I love Demetrius. Lysander: Please try to love me ! Demetrius does not love you because he loves Hermia. Can't you understand ? (DEMETRlUS awakes.) Demetrius: Helena ! Helena ! Let me kiss you ! Helena (angry) : What! A plot! Both of you men are planning to insult me. Lysander: Demetrius, do not hurt Helena. We know you love Hermia. I loved Hermia once, but now I give her to you freely. Helena: Stop hurting me. Demetrius: Lysander, you can keep Hermia. Helena is the girl for me. (Enter HERMIA. ) Hermia: Lysander ! My love ! I heard your voice among the trees and I came here. Why did you leave me sleeping? Lysander: Go away. Don't bother me. Hermia: Don't bother you! What do you mean ? Lysander: I mean I am not interested in you. Hermia: Lysander! I can't understand you at all. Helena: I understand very well. Hermia and the two of you have made a cruel agreement to hurt my feelings. Hermia, we were children together. How can you do this wicked thing to me ? Hermia: What wicked thing? I don't know what you are talking about. Helena: Didn't you encourage Lysander to tease me? Hermia: I am amazed ! What are you talking about ! Helena: You false friend ! You pretend you don't know! All is fair in love and war, I suppose? Hermia: Please explain what you mean. Lysander: Helena, let me explain, my love. Helena (sarcastically) : Oh, fine. Hermia (to LYSANDER) : Don't hurt her feelings. Demetrius: If she cannot persuade, then I can demand. Lysander: You have no power to demand from me, Demetrius. Helena, I love you and I will prove it. Let me fight Demetrius, if I die, then my death is the proof. Demetrius: Helena, don't believe him. I love you more than he does. Helena: You both love me ? Hermia: Neither of you love me ? Lysander: Let us fight it out. Hermia (takes LYSANDER's arm) : Lysander ! Lysander: Take your hands off me! Hermia: Lysander ! Lysander: Let go of me! Hermia (weeping) : Why have you changed like this ? Demetrius: You can hardly fight me now, Lysander! Hermia seems to have mastered you ! Lysander (throws HERMIA to ground): Oh! I will kill her. Hermia: Why kill me ? You hate me and that is worse than death. Last night you loved me and now everything has changed. Lysander: Yes, it has. I love Helena. Hermia (to HELENA) : You are the cause of this, Helena. Helena: Me ! Hermia: Yes, you have bewitched him. Helena: Hermia ! Have you no shame ! Hermia: I will scratch out your eyes. Helena: Help ! Keep her off me ! Hermia: You have stolen my lover. ( The men hold HERMIA away from HELENA.) Helena: We have always been friends, and I have never harmed you. Hermia: Never? Helena: Not until yesterday. Yesterday I told Demetrius that you and Lysander planned to escape from Athens and marry in secret. I hoped he would like me a little for telling him, but he threatened to kill me. I want to go home to Athens. Hermia: Then go. Lysander (to HERMIA) : Keep back, you witch. Demetrius: You are too much, Lysander. Do not try to help, Helena. She is mine. I can protect her. Lysander: Oh, can you ? You think so? Demetrius: I am not frightened of you. Lysander: Then let us go and fight it out. Demetrius: Come on then. (Exit DEMETRIUS and LYSANDER.) Helena (pleased) : Two men fighting over me! Hermia (jealous) : But no one to protect you here. Helena: Help! Hermia: No one will want you after I spoil your beauty. (HERMIA tries to attack HELENA.) Helena: Help ! Help ! (HELENA runs off.) Hermia: I'll get you ! I'll get you ! (Exit HERMIA.) Oberon: Puck! This mischief is your fault. Or did you do it on purpose ? Puck: Believe me, king of shadows, I tried to do just as you said. Oberon: Well, maybe. Now you must follow Demetrius and Lysander. Do not let them meet, or they will kill each other. Copy the voice of one and lead him away from the other. It is dark, so that will not be difficult. Puck: I will. Oberon: When Lysander is tired, he will lie down and sleep. Then squeeze the flower on his eyes. When he wakes, he will remember nothing but a foolish dream. Puck: Yes, sir. Oberon: I will go and look for Titania, and ask her for the boy. If she gives him to me, then I must free her from the love of that donkey. (Exit OBERON; enter LYSANDER ; he crosses the stage and exits; enter DEMETRIUS.) Demetrius: Lysander ! Where are you ? Puck (speaking as LYSANDER) : Here I am, come and catch me. Demetrius: It is so dark, I can't see you. Puck (as before) : This way, you fool. Demetrius: Are you afraid of me, you coward ? Puck (as before) : Come on, come on.Demetrius: I am going to kill you. (Exit DEMETRIUS ; enter LYSANDER separately.) Lysander: Demetrius, where are you? Oh, I don't know where he has gone. I feel so tired, I think I will sit down here for a minute. (LYSANDER sits, yawns, and sleeps; enter DEMETRIUS.) Demetrius: Lysander, where are you? Oh, I don't know where he has gone. I feel so tired, I think I will sit down here for a minute. (DEMETRlUS sits, yawns, and sleeps. He does not see LYSANDER ; enter HELENA.) Helena: What a long night ! I am so weary . (HELENA lies down and sleeps; enter HERMIA.) Hermia: I cannot go any further. Where can Lysander be? I hope Demetrius has not killed him. (HERMIA lies down and sleeps.) Puck: Now is my chance to correct my mistake. (He squeezes the flower on LYSANDER's eyes.)When you wake, Lysander, you will see your love and there will be no more quarreling. (Exit PUCK. Enter TITANlA and BOTTOM.) Titania: Sit here my love, and let me kiss your lovely long ears. Bottom (yawns) : I can hardly keep my eyes open. Titania: Then take a rest, my love. (BOTTOM lies down and sleeps.) Titania: I will hold you in my arms. (TITANlA sleeps; enter OBERON and PUCK.) Oberon: There is Titania ! Sleeping ! Take that donkey's head off that poor fellow. Puck: I will. : Oberon: I found Titania and she gave me the boy, so I must remove the charm. (Squeezes the flower on TITANlA's eyes.) Wake ! Titania. Titania (wakes) : Oberon! I have had the strangest dream. Oberon: Oh ? Titania: I dreamed that I loved a donkey. Oberon: You mean this fellow ? (He points to BOTTOM.) Titania: Yes. How ugly he is ! Oberon: Puck, take off his head. (PUCK takes donkey's head off BOTTOM; TITANlA laughs.) Oberon : Titania, we have quarreled too long. Titania: Yes, I have been silly. Oberon: Then let us love again. Titania: Please. Oberon: The duke Theseus will marry soon. We must help to make his wedding happy. (Exit OBERON and TITANlA; enter THESEUS and HIPPOLYTA.) Hippolyta: What a lovely night ! Theseus: This forest is a perfect place to hunt. Hippolyta: The moon is so bright ! Theseus: It will soon be morning. Hippolyta (sees the sleepers) : What's this ! Theseus: Hmmmm. Very strange… (Horn blows. Sleepers awake.) Theseus: Good morning, my friends. Lysander: The Duke ! Your pardon, my lord. Theseus (laughs) : What are you all doing here ? Lysander: Hermia and I came to escape from the laws of Athens. Demetrius: Helena told me, so I followed them. At nightfall, I went to sleep and had the strangest dream. Theseus: Lysander and Hermia have taken a great risk. Lysander: I am sorry. Theseus: This proves your great love, and I change my mind. Lysander: Really ? Theseus: Yes, I want you to marry. Demetrius: Then I can marry Helena. Hermia: We shall both marry the man we love. Theseus: Yes. You shall marry when I marry queen Hippolyta. Helena: You mean, three marriages together ? Theseus: Yes, the six of us at one time. Hippolyta: Wonderful ! Theseus: Let us go to the temple. (Exit THESEUS holding HIPPOLYTA, LYSANDER holding HERMIA, DEMETRlUS holding HELENA.) SCENE 6 (forest) Bottom (wakes): I must have been sleeping. Where are the others ? I have had the strangest dream. (Exit BOTTOM ; enter the CLOWNS.) Quince: Where is Bottom? Snout: No one can find him. Quince: Our play will be ruined. Flute: Let some one else play Pyramus. Quince: Impossible. Snug: We must do something. The duke Theseus is at his wedding and he will want his entertainment soon. Quince: Then we must find Bottom. All: Bottom ! Bottom ! Bottom (enters) : Here you are ! Where did you go ? All: Where did you go ? Bottom: I have been waiting for you rascals, here. I had a little snooze and while I was sleeping I had the most extraordinary dream. All: Tell us. Bottom: It was very interesting. All: Tell us. Bottom: No. The play, the play, have you forgotten ! The duke Theseus wants to see our play. Let us go to the duke's palace and get ready. (Exit the CLOWNS.) SCENE 7 (city) (Enter THESEUS and HIPPOLYTA.) Hippolyta: These lovers tell a strange story Theseus: Yes, but I don't believe it. Hippolyta: Why not? Theseus: When lovers walk in the forest under the moon, they think of all sorts of nonsense. It's all imagination. Hippolyta: But they all tell the same story! (Enter DEMETRIUS, LYSANDER, HERMIA, HELENA.) Theseus: Here they are ! Lysander: I hope your marriage will be long and happy. Theseus: We hope the same for you. Hippolyta: Thank you. Theseus: Now for the entertainment. Hippolyta: Some workers of Athens wish to present a play. Shall we see it ? Theseus: We should. They are faithful subjects. Tell them to come. (DEMETRIUS claps his hands; the CLOWNS enter; they are dressed for the play. Others sit and watch.) Quince: Gentles, perchance you wonder at this show. But wonder on, till truth makes all things plain. This man is Pyramus. (Points to BOTTOM.) This beauteous lady, Thisbe. (Points to FLUTE.) This man represents a wall. (Points to SNOUT.) This, a lion. (Points to SNUG.) And I am the moon.(He holds up a lantern.) Hippolyta: What is the story ? Quince: Pyramus and Thisbe are lovers. They live on different sides of this wall, so they plan to meet in the forest. Thisbe arrives first. She is surprised by a lion, so she runs away and drops her coat. The lion tears it. Pyramus arrives, finds the torn coat, thinks the lion has eaten her, and so he kills himself. Thisbe looks for him, finds his dead body and then she kills herself. The end. (Exit the CLOWNS.) Hippolyta: This is strange entertainment for our wedding day! Theseus: They mean no harm. I wonder if the lion speaks. (Enter SNOUT dressed as a wall. Enter BOTTOM as PYRAMUS.) Bottom: Oh, where is my lover, Thisbe ? Snout: She is behind me. Bottom: Thank you, courteous wall. (kneels in front of SNOUT) Show me your chink. (SNOUT makes a circle of his fingers. BOTTOM looks through SNOUT's fingers.) Bottom: Thisbe ! Snout (shouting) : Thisbe! Hurry. (FLUTE runs in. He kneels on the other side of SNOUT.) Flute (as THISBE) : Oh Pyramus, my love. Bottom: Oh . Flute: Oh. Bottom: Oh . Flute: Oh. Bottom: This is not enough. Flute: I cannot kiss you through this wall. Bottom: True. Meet me in the forest tonight. Flute: I am frightened of the dark. Bottom: There will be a moon. Flute: Yes. (Exit BOTTOM and FLUTE.) Snout: I am not needed any longer. (Exit SNOUT.) Hippolyta: This is the silliest play I have ever seen. (Enter SNUG as lion. He roars. HIPPOLYTA screams. ) Snug (showing his face) : Don't scream, gentle ladies. I am Snug. Theseus: A good and gentle lion, you see. (Enter QUINCE.) Quince: The moon begins to shine. (Enter FLUTE.) Flute: Pyramus, where are you ? (SNUG roars. FLUTE screams and runs away. He drops his coat. SNUG worries the coat, and exits.) Demetrius: Well roared, lion. Theseus: Well run, Thisbe. Hippolyta: Well shone, moon. (FLUTE, SNUG, QUINCE return, bow, and exit; enter BOTTOM. ) Bottom: Thisbe! Thisbe! Where are you ! What's this ! Her coat ? Torn ! Blood ! She is dead. My love is dead. Then die, Pyramus. (He stabs himself.) Die, die, die, die, die. Dead. (BOTTOM falls to the floor.) Lysander: Brilliant. Demetrius: What an actor ! Bottom (stands and bows) :Thank you, thank you. It was nothing. (BOTTOM lies down again, as dead.) Flute (enters) : Pyramus ! Pyramus ! Where are you ! (sees BOTTOM.) Here he is. Sleeping. No! Dead? Yes Then Thisbe does not wish to live. Let me kill myself. (BOTTOM gives the dagger to FLUTE. FLUTE stabs himself. ) Flute: Pyramus, I come ! (FLUTE falls to floor : pause.) Helena: What happens next ? Bottom (standing) : That is the end. (FLUTE stands. All clap. Exit the CLOWNS.) Theseus (stands) : The play is over and the lovers are dead. Hermia: But we are not. Lysander: We nearly killed each other in our dream. Demetrius: But the dream is finished. Theseus: And our new lives begin. ( There is music, a dance, and the lovers exit pair by pair.) |
Ms. RossSome of my favourite reads: The Book Thief, Much Ado About Nothing, Entertainment Weekly (hey, they can't all be intellectually stimulating!). Archives
December 2016
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